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Brangelina Twin Mania

Photo Licensing by GumGum | © PacificCoastNews

Yep, the hottest couple on the planet finally welcomed twins into the world, immediately eclipsing similar but somehow less exciting news from Matthew McConaughey, Nicole Kidman, and my brother-in-law's sister. This we already knew. Here's some things you may not have burned into your skull yet:

-The boy is named Knox, the girl is named Vivienne. Question: why do celebrities name their kids nutty names that will not serve them well among their peers from the ages of 8 to 16? Answer: because celebrities are not like us. They live in miniature, insular worlds where no one ever tells them they're wrong and they can get anything they want on a whim. Imagine the psychiatric damage that does to a person (and imagine how much you want it).

-The small French publication Nice-Matin scooped everybody else in the world on the twins' birth, apparently because Brad Pitt wanted a local publication to know first, and because it has a reputation for "not playing the game of paparazzi." (WENN)

-In Touch Weekly incorrectly had it on their website this morning that the couple gave birth to two girls. Somebody with way too much time on his hands then wrote a blog post blasting In Touch Weekly for irresponsible journalism, complete with "Shame on you!" ramblings and smoking-gun screencaps. I chuckled for a good thirty seconds.

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